There are moments in life that are indescribable. That moment when Tanner popped down on his knee and asked me to be the girl that gets to be by his side forever. I remember in that moment feeling so overwhelmed with emotion, with that extreme happiness and excitement you only know in the midst of a proposal(and the few days after where you are still walking on an engagement cloud--seriously, I was out of it for a solid week. I apologize if you tried to converse with me, all I could think about was the bling on my finger and my main squeeze), and with so many thoughts- simply because our minds can't wrap around what the word forever means. Sometimes, Tan and I will be chatting and I will get a glimpse into what forever might be like. It is usually when we are talking about the really mundane things in life, such as what type of milk we might by for our fridge. I think to myself "Hey wait, I am going to be buying milk with this man for the next 60+ years". I had a moment this week as Tan and I were apartment hunting. We sat down to look at numbers and lease agreements and the Apartment Manager said the lease would be 12 months. I thought to myself, we get to be together in an apartment for a whole 12 months. Then we get to move on to our next adventure. And our next adventure. And the next one. And I get to be with him for 12,000 more months+ some. I had a little glimpse into what forever just might be like.
This past week has been filled with moments. On Tuesday, April 17th, 2012 at 4:18 AM I stared through the doctor's window at the most beautiful site I have ever seen: My brand new niece, stretched out on the hospital scale, lungs blaring, bright red, healthy as can be, with thighs just like her aunt. (Obviously, we can't blame Ella for being pissed upon her entrance to the world- she had to come flying out of Laura, after being in her belly filled with Dr. Pepper and Reeses for a months. All of a sudden she has to drink milk- what the! I'd be pissed too, so I feel you there Ella.) Ella laid on the hospital scale while her new proud daddy David held her little finger and stared at her with the purest look of love. In that moment, I got another glimpse into how forever might be. Surrounded by our family, with cute little babies, watching them grow up, strengthening and developing these sweet relationships the whole way along.
On Thursday morning, I went to a funeral for my dear friends cousin who passed away at the young age of 18. The death of this son, brother, cousin, grandson and friend is so tragic and devastating for their tight knit family and all of those who know them. The service was beautiful and truly honored his life- and during it, I had another moment. A moment where I realized all of this can be taken away so quickly. Each day truly can be the last that we have, we do not know. I walked away knowing I needed to be more patient and more focused on what matters. This is hard to do when we get so caught up in ourselves all. the. time. I thought to myself how precious it is that we have the knowledge we will be with our families forever. In that moment, the word forever made complete and perfect sense.
There are indescribable moments we can't wrap our heads around- we can't explain them. We only know how we felt in the moment. When you get to start a new life with your love- the excitement, the anticipation, the eagerness for the big day and everything to follow. When you witness a new little life being brought into this world- the awe, the unconditional, all encompassing love you feel for this little soul. When someone passes away- the sadness, the grief, the faith you must muster up, and the gratitude that you have another day in this world.
What I make of it all is to appreciate the moments. I am trying to soak them up, soak them in, learn from them, grow from them, because these are the moments that make up the pages of our lives. The pages that will be our own forever.
Currently, I am soaking in every moment with this chunky, delicious, yummy, sweet bundle of love. I met Ella just 5 days ago but I already know I want us to be best friends for a long time- I plan to teach her about the finer things in life, drink diet cokes with her at Nordstrom Cafe, and have her over at her favorite aunt and uncle's house (as Tanner would say) all the time. Ella, you have reminded me in your short 5 days of life how precious these moments are. You are already so incredibly loved. Your family is so happy they get to be with you forever!
Ella Louise Prescott
8.1 Pounds of deliciousness, 21 inches
xo- A proud Auntie Anne (Yep, just like the pretzel)
